Monday, July 14, 2014

Poll: How Many Boxes Will It Take?

There are two facts that I'm distinctly aware of at the moment.

Fact One is that Mandy has a lot of craft stuff. Some of you might remember my concern that she was a hoarder and my efforts to help her reorganize her craft room. That was in July of 2012. Two years ago. And about six posts ago. Let me tell you: a lot can happen in two years. And even more craft stuff accumulation can happen in two years.

Fact Two is that we're moving. In about two weeks. We've been sort of packing and purging for a couple of weeks now, but we haven't touched the craft room. And that worries me. We have to take the craft room stuff that survived "The Great Craft Room Reorganization of 2012" and all the stuff that's found it's way into that space and move it.

I asked Mandy how many boxes she thinks it will take to pack all the stuff in her craft room and she thought for a second and threw out the number 20. Then she paused and asked what size of boxes we were talking about and if we were counting the stuff that's already packed. I think 20 boxes may be about right, if they were refrigerator boxes. Unfortunately, we don't have refrigerator boxes. Even if we did, I don't think I could lift a refrigerator box full of fabric. Packed fabric is surprisingly dense.

So I'm taking a quick poll. Here's a candid, unprepared snap shot of the craft room in its current state. How many "normal size moving boxes" do you think it will take to move her out? Let me know in the comments below. Whoever is closes gets to help load the truck.

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Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Top 10 Ways to Annoy Your Craft Blogging Wife

It's been about a year since my last top ten listing. Then again, it's been about a year since a lot of my standard posts. You'd think that in a year's time, I'd have come up with a lot of ways to annoy my craft blogging sweetheart. And you'd be right.

  1. Hack her Pintrest account and pin a few motorcycles under her "Next Projects" board.
  2. Attend the PTA meeting while she's at a blog conference and nominate her for president.
  3. Volunteer for her to make embroidered shirts for people at your work. All of them.
  4. Set her ringtones so that it plays "My Little Buttercup" from The Three Amigos whenever you call.
  5. Empty out her craft knick knack bins and use them for LEGO storage.
  6. Put LEGOs in her knick knack bins. (The kids might do this for you)
  7. Clear off the air hockey table to attempt to play a game.
  8. List her spare sewing machine on Craigslist as a WTT for a go cart.
  9. Walk behind her while she's on a Google hangout.
  10. Repeat number 9 above. Naked.

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Monday, June 16, 2014

Sometimes I throw dirt at dogs

Monkeys get to fling poo in zoos. And in their natural habitat, I suppose.

Last week a had a lot of chances to fling, not poo. But dirt. And mud.

I flung some at the dog. Not really intentionally, but those watching me work thought it was funny. All part of building a house. You can read about it here. But beware. It's long. But if you get to the bottom, you can see how Mandy helped.

Also, someone should have told me that red hat was so blinding. Remind me not to wear it in public. Unless it's WIWW.

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Sunday, June 15, 2014


In addition to being married to a craft blogger, I'm also father to four mini-crafters, and the son of a man who taught me all I know about doing man projects. Happy Fathers Day!

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Wednesday, June 11, 2014

The Flat Surface Cycle

We have a problem in our house. It involves flat surfaces. I've been studying craft rooms for quite some time now, and this problem with flat surfaces keeps coming up. It comes up often enough that I now know its not unique to our craft room. In fact, its a trait of most, if not all craft rooms.

This problem stems from a strange power inherent in most flat surfaces; the power to attract craft supplies and materials. This power is similar to that of a magnet in attracting metal, except that the flat surface attracts items much more slowly, so slowly that it is not perceivable by the human eye. The flat surface accumulates items over time, eventually disappearing beneath the items. (Note: some researchers have speculated that the problem may lie with the crafty persons, and not the flat surfaces, but it is mere speculation at this point.)

When the problem is brought to the attention of the crafty person, the area may be cleaned to some degree or another, but rest assured that items will again accumulate on the flat surface eventually. This cycle of accumulation, reclamation, and reaccumulation is know as the flat surface cycle. It's kind of like the water cycle, only it involves junk craft supplies and materials.

I did a quick Google Image Search of the phrase "craft room mess" (you might want to do the same, just to validate your statement to your husband that "my craftroom isn't as bad as it could be"). The results illustrate the fact that any flat surface has this power. The various flat surfaces have attracted all sorts of items, though fabric, patterns, paint bottles, and scissors seem to be more susceptible to the flat surface's power than things like, say, cleaning supplies.

To further illustrate this cycle, I'll use an example from our home. Recall the air hockey table that I purchased last year at a garage sale. I mentioned last month that it had been annexed by the craft room. This annexation was a result of the flat surface cycle. Typical of the flat surface cycle, the surface (air hockey table) was cleaned off today. The question is, how long will it remain clean before the cycle continues?

I'm putting the over/under at 4 days.

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Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Man Crafting vs. Blog Crafting

On Monday we did a little man crafting. I've had some readers questions whether man crafting is a real thing, and if it is, how it differs from crafting that one might do for something else, such as a craft blog. In an effort to clear up any lack of clarity on the subject, I've decided to highlight a few of the differences by comparing my recent man craft to a few past blog crafts.

1. Functionality - a man craft is done to achieve some sort of objective. In the man craft example below, the objective is to cross a creek. In the blog craft example below, the objective is to...well, look at empty frames, or something.

2. Equipment - a man craft utilizes heavy machines, while a blog craft utilizes sewing machines. It should be pointed out that blog craft equipment can't be traded for a go kart.


3. Longevity - a man craft is built to last a life time. Many man crafts are still in existence today, such as the Egyptian Pyramids, the Great Wall of China, and Stonehenge (note: some scholars debate whether Stonehenge is a man craft, since its functionality is not evident). A blog craft, on the other hand, need only last long enough for pictures to be taken.

4. Fasteners - a man craft uses some serious fasteners, such as 16d nails, deck screws, or hardened bolts. Blog crafts are held together by thread, yard, staples, or, more commonly, hot glue. I think the results of our man craft below would have been less than favorable had we opted for hot glue instead of the 6" nails in the picture below? 


There is, however, one fastener upon which both man crafters and blog crafters use in agreement.

Duct tape.

The only difference is that blog crafters refer to it as "duck" tape.

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Thursday, May 22, 2014

WTT: Embroidery Machine for Go Kart

I came across a Craigslist post this evening that I need to share. I may or may not know the poster. I feel fairly safe in posting this, since Mandy no longer checks my blog.

I've included the text below as the listings often disappear from the web once they expire. Which in this case, might be a good thing.

WTT: Embroidery Machine for Go Kart

P.S. If any of you need a Singer XL-1000, let me know...

WTT Singer Embroidery Machine XL-1000 - $1 (Liberty)

© craigslist - Map data © OpenStreetMap
For trade is a Singer Embroidery Machine, Quantum XL-1000. It comes with the embroidery arm and sewing base, so you can sew or use it for embroidery. It also comes with several different sizes of hoops. It is in good condition and works great. It has a touch screen. My wife doesn't use it anymore since she got a new embroidery machine. It comes with the manuals, which is a good thing, since I can't explain how it works or anything of the sort.

Looking to trade for a go kart. Conditions of trade:

1. Go kart must be in good running order.
2. Must be a 2 seater so the kids can ride and drive together.
3. Prefer a go kart with suspension (I'm getting too old to be banged around by one without).
4. You must come and pick up the sewing machine and drop off the go kart.
5. Pick up time must be scheduled such that my wife isn't home.
6. Trade only, since my wife doesn't want to sell the machine, even though it hasn't been used in months. By trading it I'm technically abiding by her wishes not to sell it.
7. Lightsaber in picture can be included for the right deal.
8. Fabric in picture is NOT included, as it's disappearance would be noticed.

Please reply via email only.

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